Status seeking, the wish to belong, the asserting and cementing of one’s membership in the group is a deep-seated and very natural drive whose origin and universality go beyond man and are explained by the most basic of drives, the drive to survive. -Tibor Scitovsky, The Joyless Economy
Let’s face it, we all define success and status differently. I find myself thinking about the chicken-and-egg correlations. Is success something you achieve once you’ve attained a certain status? Or is status something you have once you have achieved a certain degree of success?
Coaches are driven to help their clients ‘achieve success’. But what does that mean? It is obviously specific to each individual’s definition and vision for their life/career.
What is your definition of success?…
For me, success is the feeling of:
- being loved and supported for being my authentic self.
- waking up in the morning and being proud of who I am in that moment, even though there is no guarantee of what the future will bring, or who I will become.
- letting go of previous thought and behavior patterns that no longer serve me.
- properly managing my emotions and reactions to prevent unnecessary hurt or drama.
- being acknowledged for aspects of me that I didn’t know existed.
- trusting that if I value all of the above, I will experience a fully satisfying life.
“People buy feelings. People value—and pay more for—the way you make them feel.” – Beckwith
From Materialism to True Success
We regularly purchase status symbols to show off our achievements to those around us. There is nothing wrong with that. But we cannot pretend that material wealth alone can create a lasting sense of fulfillment for us. What good are fancy cars and expensive homes if you are too overwhelmed and stressed out to appreciate owning them?
Stop Pretending and Start Living
If your life is consumed with stress and drama, or you have regular feelings of uncertainty, ask yourself this question:
Is what I am currently investing my time, money and energy into actually creating a feeling of authentic success?
If the answer is ‘No’, please contact me. I can help you. I want to help you. Coaching is an investment that can permanently change your life for the better.